Grand Theft Auto 5

In sad news, one month after Rockstar Games released of Grand Theft Auto 5, the company has laid off the entire staff. From a spokesman: "We added digital drugs to the game play. We didn't realize that as more kids smoke pot and take Ecstasy, the level of violence drops off dramatically. Instead of stealing cars, players were hugging each other. Players who were anti-drug were so disgusted by this behavior quit the game. It was all downhill from there." We had video of one anti-drug gamer explaining why he quit the game. Unfortunately, he stole our iPhone before we could upload the video.